It's hard to take pictures in the skating rink anyway because the lighting is always kind of wild. Here are the two best pictures we got:
We generally enjoy going to FSA activities. Anyone who has any connection to adoption is always invited. The people who usually attend are adoptive families, birth moms and dads, caseworkers, etc. We do sometimes feel like imposters at the activities, though, since we haven't adopted yet. And sometimes there are people at the activities who think we are a little weird because we have biological kids. FSA is the only place where people stare at you because your kids look like you. I should have skated with Daniel and had Wayne skate with Benjamin. Then maybe we wouldn't have looked so out of place.
It's hard to know where we fit in. We don't exactly fit in with the people at church who have four or five kids, and most of my friends who are anywhere near my age have had babies in the last two or three years (or are currently pregnant). On the other hand, having secondary infertility is different from never having given birth. But seriously, we have been hoping for more kids for more than 5 YEARS!!! I feel like we've suffered enough to earn our spot in the club. So, we go to FSA activities. We have fun. We meet interesting people. And we try not to care what anyone else might think about our being there.
It's hard to know where we fit in. We don't exactly fit in with the people at church who have four or five kids, and most of my friends who are anywhere near my age have had babies in the last two or three years (or are currently pregnant). On the other hand, having secondary infertility is different from never having given birth. But seriously, we have been hoping for more kids for more than 5 YEARS!!! I feel like we've suffered enough to earn our spot in the club. So, we go to FSA activities. We have fun. We meet interesting people. And we try not to care what anyone else might think about our being there.
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Your rollerskating looked like so much FUN!!!!!! Hang in there; there's always a rainbow at the end of the storm, (Isn't there?)
ReplyDeleteTrue, as long as the sun emerges from the storm clouds at a relatively low azimuth.
ReplyDeleteI feel for you trying to feel like you belong. I think everyone feels the same way at certain times in thier lives. I think that your family is amazing and will find happiness no matter what happens. Skating looks like a lot of fun.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry your little miracle is taking so long. I'm sure the heartache at times can feel unbearable. Hang in there. Keep going to those FSA activities. It kind of helps keep you focused on the positive aspects of adoption. But I do know how you feel about not feeling like you fit in. We haven't been involved over the last few years because it's been so long since we adopted and now that we have a biological child, it feels like we no longer fit in with "the norm."
ReplyDeleteAnyway, please know that we are supporting you and hoping for the best for you. In fact, I have hung on to a few of your pass-along cards, just in case. I placed several at our library and other public offices, but I have a couple that I'm keeping for the "golden moment" that I pray comes along.